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If you haven’t read hoverfrog’s post from yesterday, do so now. What stood out the most to me isn’t the fact that Westboro was acting like a bunch of bozos (again), but rather the reaction of the author of the post.
One of the things I appreciate most about FriendlyChristian.com is that it gives me (and others) a chance to show the world that Christianity isn’t about hating gays, arguing over religions, acting like you’ve got it all figured out cuz “I’m blessed, brother!” Say what you want about me and/or this site, but the facts are facts: walls are being torn down, people are learning from each other, relationships are forming, both Christianity & Atheist are being show in new lights, etc.
Christianity, though, is taking a severe beating from a small minority with a loud voice. It’s time to do something about it.
Let’s put words into action. Christians, what do we do about churches who select domain names such as GodHatesFags.com (I’m not linking there. Go there yourself if you’re interested). What do we do about our neighborhood “bullhorn preacher” that tells every passerby that he/she is gonna burn eternally? How do we combat the countless high-profile preachers that are falling into sinful lifestyles, making the news, and inevitably changing how the world perceives Christians/Christianity? What’s the solution? Do we just continue to love and serve one act of kindness at a time? Or do we follow the advice of this comment that Sara left yesterday?
What needs to happen is for Christians nationwide to get together and SPEAK OUT VERY LOUDLY against this trash.
I’d love to hear what you guys think. Like it or not, we seem to be digging ourselves deeper and deeper. It’s sad.
hoverfrog/everyone else: For what it’s worth, on behalf of all us Friendlys, I apologize for the actions of these radical “Christian” organizations. I hope you can see through their BS.
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It was 35 years ago … that “Leave It to Beaver” world is only a fond memory. I can still see the exact shade of ’seafoam green’ paint on the cinder block walls of that 6th grade classroom. It’s funny how the mundane is imprinted in our minds as we move through life altering moments.
Coach King, the basketball coach, was giving a talk in our health (aka sex ed) class. The topic that day: homosexuality. Oh, I forgot to mention that this was an evangelical Christian grade school … the lecture also came with a healthy dose of Scripture, judgment and condemnation.
Until that day, I never really thought much about my growing attraction to some of the boys in my class. Like a sunrise, sexuality was just beginning to peek over the horizon of my adolescent and protected world. On that day my ‘attraction’ had a name: homosexual. I had a label: ‘queer.’ Above all, a 13-year old boy that loved Jesus was told he was going to hell. On that day sexuality burst over the horizon and cast long and very dark shadows. On that day a child discovered despair.
Have you ever prayed? Not the casual “God, let me win the lottery tonight” prayer. I mean the sort of prayer that comes from some dark place that is begging for the light. My prayer was “God, change me (make me straight) or take me (end my life)”. For weeks, it was a mantra I repeated over and over as I cried myself to sleep.
You know what? Every morning I woke up — every morning I woke up gay. Maybe God feels like he made me just that way I’m supposed to be.
The folks at Westboro Baptist Church are the extreme. There are more ‘main stream’ evangelists that preach a similar message … remember Falwell saying that gays were (in part) to blame for 9/11? Isn’t the WBC message delivered every time someone uses the phrase “that’s so gay” to demean something?
Though it all, I’ve managed to keep my faith. Many of my gay/lesbian friends had similar experiences. Almost all of them tell me they have turned their backs on the church and God because they feel rejected and excluded. Is this the “Good News”? How many Christian kids, just discovering that they’re gay, will feel rejected by a church that has nurtured them?
These days I believe in a God the calling ALL OF US to the same place because we are loved. And I’m looking forward to the surprised faces of the Westboro Church members when I see them in Heaven.
For more, check this out http://www.soulforce.org
I do not judge anyone…as a child i was told that I could not know God because HE curses generation on generations for one persons sin..a small amount of truth with a large amount of crap…but an abused child that i was saw it as because my dad was so evil, there was no hope for me…God came and changed it all.
My real problem with Westboro, and also radical Islam, is it breeds hate. And we must be very careful to not allow it to change us.
Ward- I have lived through just about everything imaginable, and I am hear to tell you that God loves you, HE truly does.
As Christ followers we have to be loud in our faith, and show those around us the difference in religion and relationship. Jesus had lots of problem with the religious leaders.
Maybe we should write to CNN or Headline News and tell them about FC and about what we are doing here. Maybe news will be short and they will want to do a piece on us! think about that- LOL Bill and Hover on Larry King! could happen!
Ward, your story isn’t unique but it’s well worth the retelling. Thank you.
The anti-gay sentiment that seems to be tied into Christianity is based on less than a handful of passages in the Old Testament and I think just one in the New Testament. Hardly cause for eternal damnation.
Darla, write. Go for it. Send a copy to the bigot at WBC. I was thinking of writing to him myself. I wonder if he’s the sort of person who replies to letters….
I don’t know if this is relevant, but I am a brand-new Christian. And one of the things that I keep hearing is that “God made me this way.” I really struggle with that one. God originally made me a Muslim. Throughout my twenties, I had the kind of personality that loved to party, drink, smoke pot, skip school, and not be disciplined about work. If I did think about God back then, I would think, “Well, God made me that way!” We’re all human — we all have good and bad faults… good and bad characteristics. I have a friend who has to work on her compulsive spending. I know there are people out there who love having sex. There are others that are compelled to steal. If God chose you as one who has an especially challenging situation, that means it’s YOUR job to over come it, abide by the rules of the Bible, worship and praise the Lord, and believe in Christ. We can all easily chuck up bad personality traits and born-characteristics as “Well, that’s how God made me.” In the end, on the day of Judgment, the only thing that will matter is that we had free will to do absolutely whatever we chose. Denying that is simply an excuse.
@darla if you write to WBC, be expected to have an ignorant email sent back to you. Just to give you a heads up.
Maria, I agree that blaming God is ultimately a pointless and wasteful exercise. Probably more for an atheist like me that a Christian like you.
I also agree that individuals need to work hard to overcome their weaknesses. A desire to steel through greed is a good example as is frivolous overspending or living outside your means. I would disagree with you that homosexuality is one of these weaknesses. There is research available that indicates that homosexuality is a trait that is switch on in species that experience large populations and overcrowding. It seems to be genetically part of all mammals but only active in a small proportion. This is about 10% of humans.
You’re not saying that sex is bad are you? While I’ve had bad sex I never had sex that was wrong.
Hov,
Sex is like pizza, even when it’s bad it’s good.
Hov,I already did write to him on friday, and I still haven’t recieved any response. ED left me a message that I found interesting…these people at WBC are not even affliated with the Baptist church, they have actually been kicked out for their off the wall thinking. :)>-
HappyNat, mmmm pizza.
Darla, if not for the English Reformation the Pope would have had the option of excommunicating the bigot. Then he woudl have been in trouble. >:)
In the Wikipedia article on the WBC it reads:
“In the documentary The Most Hated Family in America, the young girls in the church express no interest in getting married, because “that’s not what we are about”
Well at least they are not breeding.
I don’t see the WBC as being any kind of religious organization. It’s a family, mostly, cult lead by a delusional, sick man. It’s more about one person controlling a group to feed his own ego and hoping to get his name in the press.
Christian leaders should speak out more about the hate groups using the name of God to try and spread their sickness. It is a sickness that has been a part of man’s history for far to long.
I think to counter the image being created by groups like this, that Christians and God, hate gay people, the Christian community needs to do a better job of getting across their belief that it is the sin not the sinner that are opposed to.
I would be a good thing if the Christian and gay communities built some bridges between their communities.
Maria, I would argue that there is a difference between a) being like countless teens and young adults who get a rush out of breaking the rules, establishing independence from parents, and wanting to have a good time with friends, and b) realizing that you are not like everyone else and have these internal feelings and thoughts that society as a whole (generally) says is wrong and immoral. Go back and read Ward’s story. Does that sound like just a ‘personality’ trait? To compare the dread, stress, and anxiety that someone like Ward has gone through day after day to a twenty something with a party vice is somewhat trivializing.
Ward you have displayed great courage to be able to stay with your convictions, your belief in God, through all the trials of being gay in America.
I know that the Christians who blog here are a very caring people. I am sure they follow the guidance of their teachings, love the sinner but not the sin (as they see it in their eyes).
What is difficult is for straight people, atheist and Christians, to really understand the trials a gay believer in America must endure.
You have told your story very eloquently. I recently read another. Christians, and all straight people, need to know what gays face. There might be a little less hate, a little more love.
It’s a story about a gay minister, Scott Harrison, how was part of the “ex-gay movement” from 1982 to 1990. He describes a three hour session as “spiritual rape”.
http://www.splcenter.org/intel/intelreport/article.jsp?aid=847
From the article:
“Scott, how did you first get involved with the ex-gay movement?”
I grew up in the ’60s in a conservative evangelical home, in a Baptist environment. From a young age, I learned homosexuality was not only bad but was the worst sin a person could do. It was worse than murder. For me, the two options I saw, once I realized I was gay, were to commit suicide and go to heaven or to come out as gay and go to hell. [The ex-gay movement] offered a third option.”
It was very intense, dramatic, group prayer. It lasted at least t hree hours. At the end, I was drenched in sweat. There were some real areas of psychological wounding. All I can really describe it as — because of how it happened and the incorrectness of the theology — is that it felt like a spiritual rape to me.
I’m not saying he [the minister] didn’t have good intentions, but it amounted to a spiritual rape. The exorcism occurred that afternoon, and then we ran into the evening church service. I’ve got hearing issues. I’m fairly hard of hearing; I had hearing aids at the time. This person was convinced that God had given word that I was supposed to give up my hearing aids, that God would heal my hearing. He did this in front of 300 people. I was psychologically vulnerable. I didn’t follow my better hunches. Even though it happened over 20 years ago, it’s hard to still not blame myself. … I knew there wasn’t a demon of homosexuality.
The [minister] said that if I let him crush my hearing aids, then God would give me back my hearing. He said he would pay for them if God didn’t give me back my hearing. Then, he later reneged on that. For the next several weeks, I was faking that my hearing had been healed.”
I think on balance that it’s worth saying that their are many vicars who actively encourage homosexuals to go to church and be part of that community rather than separate from it. Not in a way that preaches at them to change their “wicked ways” but in an accepting and loving way. Vicars like this are an example that we could do with more of.
I’m reminded of this in my own life. On the one hand I see religious friends (in real life) who genuinely believe that homosexuals are thoroughly corrupt and beyond redemption. On the other I have a friend who married her girlfriend a few years ago prior to civil partnerships in law. Her vicar was denied the use of the church by his dioceses so he conducted the wedding in a pub.
It was a simple ceremony mainly due to the size of the venue but friendly and fun. It had everything that you’d expect from wedding: screaming kids; crying mums, nervous bride; gleaming groom (even if she was a she); a dress and a bouquet. In short, a traditional wedding. The fact that the vicar was more than happy to conduct the ceremony says a lot about him and his beliefs. It would have been easy to say no as his superior in the church would have liked.
I just saying this because I very rarely give credit to religious people
and it’s worth pointing out that not all religious practitioners are homophobic bigots. Even if it is pretty obvious. There are horror stories and negative images that are catchy and headline grabbing like Scott’s story above but the tale of a simple wedding conducted without fuss and bother can be quietly and easily ignored.
Homosexuality falls into the category of sin…period. Everyone is born a sinner, so if prior to receiving Jesus as your personal savior then it’s a sin that you can become caught up in just as lying, or gossiping, or stealing, etc. Of course there’s scientific evidence that supports a homosexual gene…Satan is very good at what he does. Which is trying to make things appear to be nothing at all. Or distorting God’s word to fit. There are extremists in every avenue…from people who don’t believe that persecute believers, to believers who persecute those who don’t. Follow HIS full word and filter out the rest. God loves us but he hates sin. I am a Christian and I believe His word, Gay, Straight, whatever judgement is not given to us. I have a friend who deals with homosexuality. He speaks of the Bible and the convictions that he feels being laid on him about it. I was one of the first people that he came out to…I’m not his judge, I’m his friend. Do I pray for him…YES! Anyone who sins Christian or not, doesn’t need to hear someone tell them they are wrong…they don’t need someone to tell them they are going to hell. They need someone to pray for them, with them, and be a supporting part for them, and a willing piece for God to fit into place. So that God can work in his own time.